“You’re going to feel like hell someday if you don’t tell your story.”
As a general rule, I don’t use profanity. Please don’t read any smugness into that statement, as I fight a sharp tongue, sarcasm, and all sorts of other trash talk on a regular basis. I keep Psalm 141:3 on repeat in my prayers as both confession and petition. I do; however, tend to avoid most four letter words except if I stump my toe, you’ll likely hear me say, “Cuss. Cuss. Cuss.” It tends to work for me.
All that to say, I didn’t take the title of this little note to you lightly. I wanted something that sounded less hard and harsh, but this quote from Anne Lamott just fit so aptly to describe why I’m back after being “gone” for a full year. My last GloryStory was in January, and my social media has near dried up. My virtual disappearance (no pun intended!) has likely gone unnoticed by you and maybe by all,
but it has felt near fatal to me. I wanted to write. I had lots to say … imagine that?! But I couldn’t and I didn’t and I hated it. I could blame it on many things, but at the root of it is fear.
And now for the real giggle in all of this: Many of you will remember that I pick #justoneword each year… 2019’s word… you guessed it… fearless. God had a thing or two or ten to teach me in the last year. Battling fear was undoubtedly my biggest lesson. If God gave report cards, I likely, if even, barely scored a passing grade. Translate that to mean most days the battle is still real. But I have learned one thing:
fearing God leaves me less fearful.
The more I fear God, the less I fear the unknown.
The more I fear God, the less I fear the judgment of others.
The more I fear God, the less I focus on myself.
The more I fear God, the less I hold tightly in my fist.
I could add so many more lines to this list, but plain and simple:
The more I fear God, the less I fear.
And that brings me to 2020.
Fear says I might fail, but faith says I might fly.
And that’s why my #justoneword for 2020 is LEAP!
I’ve sat back quiet for a full year.
I’ve wrestled with fear and insecurity.
I’ve held big dreams tight fisted in my hands.
I’ve muddled through the mundane while searching for the significant.
I’ve watched and waited… and wrestled more.
I’ve tiptoed to the edge only to turn back.
But 2020 is the year I leap, knowing it is not about me,
but about a mighty God who works powerfully through our faith.
“And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.” Hebrews 11:6
I may not have written for a year, but my heart still beats passionately to love a little louder… to be a blessing and encouragement to you in any way I can… to cast that tiny story stone that causes a little ripple of His love and truth and joy in your life… and hopefully spreads wildly into the lives of others.
I promise I won’t leave you hanging this year, and I boldly pray you’ll stick with me!
with big love,
12 years of #justoneword …
Want to join me in #justoneword2020?
Email me for all the details. It’s not too late!