In Over My Head And Chasing Deeper Waters

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When I sat down to type this post tonight, I wasn’t sure my fingers would remember how. The last time I wrote on this blog was February 25. A little over four months ago. It was my last day in Romania. A lot has happened since then. We built Sanctuary Oaks, a meeting/retreat facility on our property. A place where people can Know Him and Make Him Known. We had a wedding at our home and welcomed Ashley, our first daughter and our answered prayer for Cameron. And just this past weekend, we had an engagement party at our home, and we welcomed our soon to be second daughter, Sarah, and our answered prayer for Logan. And if that is not enough, God has patiently guided and sustained me in every aspect of the ministry He has called me to do. He has overwhelmed me with His provision and His abundance… more than I could ask for or imagine.

Y’all remember how back on January 2 I wrote about my word for 2014? Of course you probably don’t so let me just remind you that every year I pick a word for the year. Well, sometimes the word picks me. That would be the case for 2014. Seriously. Although I’m known to be quite crazy, I’m not even sure I would’ve picked this word. The word… Chase. Yep, what was I thinking? Even when it picked me, I should have rebelled and chosen something safer. Something like Rest. Or Wait. Or Peace. But Chase? I should’ve known what I was in for. But there is no surprise in the fact that God knew exactly what I was in for, and He put running shoes on my feet when I didn’t even know it.

On the first day of each month (or thereabouts), I’ve taken a picture of my feet somewhere. The picture above is of my feet in the shallow end of a pool. And yes, I clearly recognize it is NOT the first of the month, but the date of the picture is as appropriate as the picture itself. The only thing more appropriate would’ve been a picture of my feet in 20ft deep water. But, since I don’t have a waterproof camera and I can’t hold my breath under water, the shallow end of the pool seemed like a much better plan. The fact that I am six days late in doing something as simple as snapping a picture of my feet clearly tells you that I’m not only chasing, but I’m running behind. Add the water to the equation, and I bet you’ve figured it out. I’m also in over my head. And for this well-organized, near Type A, goal-oriented, need all the details, got-life-all-figured-out chick, you might think I’m flailing my arms and gasping for air and in near panic.

But. I’m. Not.

Have you heard the Hillsong song Oceans? The lyrics capture where I’m at perfectly.

You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown where feet may fail
And there I find You in the mystery
In oceans deep, my faith will stand

And I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

I couldn’t say it more perfectly. Out upon the water. In the deep. And I’m not a good swimmer But you know what? I’ve discovered exactly what the second verse of the song says:

Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You’ve never failed and You won’t start now

The deep is exactly where I want to be. In over my head. Beyond anything I could possibly do on my own. In miracles-are-required territory. Because, friends, that’s where we find God. In the deep. That’s where we see Him move and work in ways we can’t imagine. That’s where there is absolutely no chance we’ll try to steal any credit or glory because we know there is no way… no way!… it’s us. It’s all Him.

So… I’m tying on my running shoes, and I’m chasing deeper waters.

Someone who’s  getting dunked repeatedly by difficult circumstances is going to read this
I pray you’ll hear one thing: Our God is faithful.

Someone who’s being tossed about by the daily chaos of life is going to read this…
I pay you’ll hear one thing: Our God is faithful.

Someone who’s convinced he/she can’t swim is going to read this…
I pray you’ll hear one thing: Our God is faithful.

Someone who’s got his/her swimsuit on, but has never been wet is going to read this…
I pray you’ll hear one thing: Our God is faithful.

Someone who’s only got his/her big toe in the “Follow Jesus” pool is going to read this…
I pray you’ll hear one thing: Our God is faithful. 

Someone who’s playing in the shallow end where it’s safe is going to read this…
I pray you’ll hear one thing: Our God is faithful.

And for all of you, I pray one thing… that you’ll join me in the deep!

4 thoughts on “In Over My Head And Chasing Deeper Waters”

  1. Trae, once again I happened upon something you’ve shared and it hits home. My son, Brett, plays this song often at church because we love it so and his friend and praise band member got a new cello. Win-win right?! I too feel like I am chasing my role in God’s big plan and sometimes I step off the ledge into the deep. To be reminded who the ultimate Lifeguard is gives my soul rest. Thank you for reminding me.

    1. Wendy, so glad you’re with me in the deep end! Don’t you love how God will use something as random as a blog to speak true and confirmation to us. Just added proof of how much He loves us!

  2. Was excited to see a post from your blog in my inbox! I was also blessed and challenged to launch out into ‘deeper waters’ with The Lord! Bless you!

    1. Dawn, thank you! I appreciate the sweet encouragement, and I’m thrilled you’re joining me in deep waters. We have the best lifeguard ever! Blessings and joy!

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