I won’t go into the whole, “I need a grandbaby girl” thing again because y’all have already heard that story, but still… I want you to feel my pain when I say it’s tough being the only girl in the house. None of the men in my life have the slightest bit of appreciation for my creative decorating skills, my Pinterest projects, or my re-purposed, turned downright adorable junque (that’s “junk” for my male readers in case I lost you here). Not only do my men not appreciate it, they flat don’t understand it. In their world, things don’t have to match or look cute. They simply have to be functional. Oh, the torture.
So, it’s that time again. Time to move Cameron back to Stephenville, but thankfully it is “Hello apartment!” No more dorm squalor. He’ll have his own bedroom and bathroom, a living room, and kitchen with island dining. I could just picture it. Give me half a day and two trips to Hobby Lobby, and I could work wonders.
Just one tiny problem. He’s not having any part of it. No way. No how. This is what he told me. “Mom. Listen closely. I need three things. A plain bedspread, a white board so I can leave notes for Kole (his roommate) so he won’t forget anything, and some hooks for the door. That’s it. Nothing else. No decorations. No cute stuff. No nothing.” Yes, that “no nothing” is a quote. And, it should be noted that the only reason he needed a “plain bedspread” is because last year he was in a dorm with a twin bed, and this year he’ll have a full bed. Otherwise, what he’d had last year would’ve worked just fine, thank you.
So I take him and his sweetie to Kohl’s on Tuesday night. I’d already checked out Target, and it was a bust. Kohl’s didn’t treat us any kinder. Off to Walmart we go. And, lo and behold, the bedding of his dreams.
Take a look at this (and yes, I couldn’t help but put it in one of my re-purposed, turned downright adorable pieces of junque!):
Yes. Believe it. Transformers bedspread and matching sheets. And, worse yet, I paid hard-earned money for them. Actually, it was impossible not to buy it for him because he got absolutely giddy right there in the bedding aisle at Walmart. Ashley (his sweetie who is truly adorable!) had the quote of the night when she said, “Cameron, I’ve never seen you get this excited.” Priceless, even if I think the bedspread is hideous. There went my decorating dreams and the best decorated apartment award.
But, besides giving me a great belly laugh for the night, it got me to thinking…
One of the things I dearly love about Cameron is that he’s just comfortable in his own skin. He doesn’t feel the need to try and impress anyone, and he doesn’t get all caught up in worrying about what other people think. He doesn’t have to have name brand anything. Heck, he doesn’t even care if his clothes match. Whereas it took me several months to choose just the right bedding for our master bedroom, it took Cam exactly three seconds. He saw it. He loves Transformers. Decision made. He doesn’t give a rip if someone laughs or teases him about it. All he needed to do was feel the sheets and make sure they weren’t itchy.
And, seriously, I have to admit sometimes I wish I was that comfortable in my own skin. I often change clothes three or four times before I can decide what I think looks good. I might even get desperate enough to go ask Brad for an opinion. I won’t even attempt to explain the psychological conditions prompting that behavior as there is no conceivable logical rationale, but suffice it to say, I do it. He always assures me I look great (thank you, honey!) And, even after all that, I might still manage to walk out the door of the house not feeling good about the way I look. There is a diagnosis for this condition, and I’m sure there is treatment, but I’ve been working on the underlying root of the problem, especially since it impacts every facet of my life:
- Failure to appreciate exactly who I am because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
- Failure to appreciate the blessings God has so richly poured out on me.
- And, without a doubt, a focus on the wrong things – earthly rather than eternal.
When I find myself falling into this trap, I remember the words of 1 Samuel 12:24 NLT – a verse I memorized in May 2011 when I made up my mind to begin dealing with this issue. In Samuel’s farewell speech, he reminds the people, “But be sure to fear the Lord and serve him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you.”
“But be sure to fear the Lord…” – Father, I stand in awe of you and the way you care for me.You don’t miss a single detail in my life. You hear every prayer. You love and forgive me even though I am unworthy.
“…and serve him faithfully…” – Father, I pray my focus will be on loving others and sharing your grace and mercy with them. There are so many who need to know you and experience your goodness. Help me be your hands and feet.
“…with all your heart;” – Father, I need to do some heart-cleaning. Help me rid my heart of pride, self-centeredness, materialism, and earthly things – anything that is taking up space that belongs to you.
“…consider what great things he has done for you.” – Father, you have given me so much. You have blessed me beyond measure. You gave me an incredible family and have met my every need. But, most of all, you loved me so much that you gave your one and only Son to die on the cross for me. That’s enough, Father. That’s more than enough.
I’m working hard to be comfortable in His skin!